Matthew Modine For President.

Although, Matthew Modine would be a better President than Donald Trump. It’s not what you think. The veteran film and television star has announced he is running for President of SAG-AFTRA. Modine is best known for his roles in the films Full Metal Jacket, Vision Quest, Pacific Heights and Short Cuts (just to name a few). And more recently, as Dr. Martin Brenner on the hit Netflix show Stranger Things. However, his most important role might be serving the 160,000 members of the Screen Actors Guild.

I am officially endorsing Matthew Modine for President. Here’s why, I’ve been working as an background actor for the past three years. And let me tell you it is not easy. Jobs are hard to come by and the pay is low. Non-union background actors earn $106/8hrs. The union rate is a bit higher $170/8hrs. But once you join the union at the steep rate of $3,000, union background actors often end up working less because there are fewer union roles (we need to work on that). On set, background actors are often treated like second class citizens. I’ve seen it all. I’ve even had a Production Assistant refer to a group of us as his “slaves.” I kid you not. We work long grueling hours in extreme weather conditions and have to fight for air-conditioning, heaters, water and most of all respect. Not all productions are run this way but more than I’d care to report. Matthew has promised to represent everyone. In fact, he started out as a background actor himself. And vows to include everyone in his fight.

He wants to bring people together and advocate for equality, safe working conditions and to ensure actors are paid well. But that’s not all, he’s addressed the issue of sexual harassment head on. And promises, “to protect all members from sexual misconduct and abuse by implementing stronger safeguards, easier reporting mechanisms and stricter penalties.”

Modine challenges incumbent President Gabrielle Carteris whose held the position since 2016. Carteris has come under fire for not working hard enough to keep productions working in Los Angeles. The Beverly Hills 90210 revival (#BH90210) for which Carteris will reprise her role as Andrea Zuckerman was filmed in Vancouver.

On a side note, I’ve left comments on social media for both Matthew and Gabrielle regarding the pricey $3,000 membership fee. Matthew responded with “I hear you” and Gabrielle has been radio silent. But she did find time to view a non-related Instagram story of mine (I have photo evidence). At least, I know Matthew Modine is paying attention. It is my dream to become a SAG-AFTA member. When it does happen, I will also advocate for the underdog, for those who can not speak for themselves.

Supporters include Patricia Arquette, Rosanna Arquette, Ed Harris, Melissa Joan Hart, Nancy Sinatra, Mena Suvari, Mira Sorvino, Elizabeth Perkins, Danny Aiello, Johnathon Schaech and more. Johnathon Schaech replied to one of my tweets, “Matthew knows. Let’s get it done! And do it right. We can. We will. And so it is.”

Modine has launched a GoFundMe page with a goal of $100,000. If you would like to donate please visit:
https://www.gofundme.com/matthew-modine-sagaftra-president-2019

Let’s make it happen!

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#BH90210, The Drama Continues…

When I was in high school, 90210 was the most popular show on television. At school, everyone would gather the morning after to discuss each episode. I even styled my hair and grew out my sideburns to look like Brendon and Dylan. I will forever be a fan. It’s part of who I am. So when I heard a revival was in the works, I was over the moon excited. With the sudden passing of Luke Perry earlier this year, the fate of the show was up in the air. And Shannen Doherty (now healthy), who had a very tough time battling cancer hadn’t yet signed on.


The drama doesn’t end there. According to Variety, “Showrunner Patrick Sean Smith and multiple senior-level writers have quit the six-episode series. The exact reason for the exodus is unclear. One source said the dispute was over interference from two of the show’s lead actresses, while another noted that the writers were unhappy with one of the executives overseeing the project. Paul Sciarrotta has been named the new showrunner along with series’ creators Chris Alberghini and Mike Chessler.”

The “BH90210” revival reunites cast original cast members Jason Priestley, Shannen Doherty, Jennie Garth, Ian Ziering, Brian Austin Green, and Tori Spelling. The show filmed “mockumentary” style will follow the cast members playing versions of themselves, coming together for a reunion. The premise seems a bit convoluted but I hear it will make references to the original show and that fans will not be disappointed.

On a personal note, I had some drama with Ian Ziering; he owes me an apology. I won’t get into the gory details but he knows what he did. Oh, and I really need to talk to Gabrielle Carteris, she’s the President of SAG-AFTRA. I really don’t understand why membership is so expensive? Actors can barely afford to eat and it cost $3,000 dollars to join! I’ll revisit this at a later time.

“BH90210” will premiere on Fox, August 7. Check out the trailer below.

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Liza Koshy: Hollywood’s Positive Power Player

It’s been hell of a week, I was booked on two shows. Happy to get work (I need it). But by the time Wednesday rolled around, I started to feel sick. Coughing, sneezing, swollen eyes and fever. I looked as if someone punched me in the face. I thought, “How on earth am I going to get through the next three days?” I was booked on the YouTube Premium series “Liza On Demand” starring the self proclaimed “Introvert gone wild,” Liza Koshy. There was no way I was going to miss out on the opportunity. I didn’t care if I fell out on set. Plus there is always a Medic on hand (by the way, thanks for the Mucinex).

Liza Koshy began her career posting comedic videos on Vine which manifested into a successful YouTube channel. According to IMDB, “Liza has one of the fastest-growing YouTube channels of all time gaining nearly 6 million subscribers in 2016 alone, at times, gaining more subscribers than any other YouTube channel.” In 2018, Liza would star and produce “Liza On Demand” which is currently filming its second season. Liza plays “Liza,” a 24 year old navigating through life in Los Angeles working odd jobs as a “Tasker.” Similar to the “real life” app TaskRabbit. Oddly enough, I recently applied to TaskRabbit and received the response below. Really?

Anyway, Liza’s character gets hired to do things people don’t have time for or want to do themselves. In the pilot episode, Liza is tasked with putting down someone’s cat. In episode two, Liza notices how a male tasker receives preferential treatment. With that, she decides to dress like a dude to get more business. She confronts societal issues like gender inequality through laughter.

I can’t tell you anything about the episode I worked on. But I can say, it was a blast. Liza is fun, funny, and full of infectious energy; she set the tone. Everyone was lovely, kind, and respectful. In Hollywood that is rare. As I stood on set with the cameras ready to roll, feeling like I was hit by a garbage truck. Liza introduced herself. She said, “You are killing it.” A little encouragement and positive vibes go a long way. For many of us, trying to break into the industry it is rough. Jobs are hard to come by and don’t pay much. The hours are long and lots of times background actors are treated with zero respect. So Liza, I applaud and thank you!

Be sure to check out Season One and be on the lookout for Season Two soon. I’ll keep you posted when my episode airs! It’s going to be a GOOD one!!

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Carnie Wilson On Career, Sobriety, Social Media Trolls And Her Greatest Accomplishment Of All; Motherhood.

As a gay child, I didn’t feel like the other boys. I didn’t fit in. I remember being depressed and worried that I would disappoint my parents. My father was very strict and abusive. I feared him. One day before school, I turned on MTV and watched the debut of Wilson Phillips’s inspirational “Hold On” video. Wilson Phillips comprised of Carnie and Wendy Wilson, daughters of Brian Wilson of The Beach Boys. And Chynna Phillips, daughter of John and Michelle Phillips of The Mamas & the Papas; musical royalty.

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From Right to Left: Carnie, Chynna and sister Wendy

The “Hold On” video was shot in the California Mountains and Venice Beach, providing a beautiful backdrop for the quintessential SoCal trio. Always the dreamer, the “Hold On” video gave me the willpower to keep hoping that everything would be OK. I was captivated by the beauty of their lyrics and celestial images. I wanted to escape to the mountains as well. I set a goal to one day move to California. So here I am, many moons later, pursuing my dreams of being a writer and actor.

I met Carnie Wilson via Twitter a few years ago. Carnie has inspired countless fans around the world with her voice, infectious sense of humor and brutal honesty concerning her struggles with weight and sobriety. What an honor that she agreed to an interview!

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Carnie, thank you so much for taking the time. Its crazy that we met on Twitter. I love that you are so active on social media, what do like about it? What don’t you like?

No problem! I like social media most of the time. I really enjoy being able to interact with people and fans. I am mostly enlightened and appreciate the more supportive and humorous postings and tweets. It’s really cool to maybe give people who are needing little nudges of encouragement kind responses that can be with a simple heart emoji! Naturally, I hate negative comments and find it hard not to do so myself. There really isn’t any need for it. It takes  a lot for me to not respond in a vulgar way sometimes. I have a potty mouth and just wanna go off. But I’ll stoop to their level if I do!!!!  People are bored and unhappy…. those are the big losers who just like to bully others and put people down. Their lives must SUCK.

You always post a song for the day and a song for the night, how do you come up with your selections?

SFTD and SFTN is like a necessity for me now! Funny, people wait for it now too. I love this because all of this is a love for music. I have a very wide range of taste when it comes to music. I love the B52’s to Sade. So, usually I go with more up-tempo for the day and more mellow for PM. It can be a beat or guitar riff I’m hearing in my head. Or maybe it’s a lyric I’m being reminded of just watching my kids play or walking down the street. But I have music in my head at all times and it can feel kinda crazy because I can’t remember if I’ve tweeted it before. It’s been like two years since I’ve started this…I know I’m on repeat (laughs out loud)!

What artist do you connect with most and why?

I am a huge fan of Yacht Rock, mellow 70’s, disco, and R& B. On any given day, you’ll hear my Pandora on The Carpenters, Steely Dan, ELO, Seal, Backstreet, Annie Lennox, Toto, Little River Band stations. I love it all. My favorite singers are Babs, Ann Wilson, Annie Lennox, Patti LaBelle, Karen Carpenter, Stevie Nicks, Sade, Luther Vandross, Steve Perry, Frank Sinatra, Michael McDonald and Seal. All their voices make me crazy with emotion and I just try to sing along and thank God for their gifts.

What do you think of the pop stars of today?

Pop stars today… I like Gwen Stefani, Adele, Meghan Trainor, Ed Sheeran, Coldplay, Sara Bareilles…. Honestly…. other than Meghan Trainor ….the younger talent right now is disposable to me. Enough said.

If Wilson Phillips were to debut today, how do you think they would be received?

If Wilson Phillips were to debut right now… I think we’d have pretty good success. The positive messages and harmony is coming back!! At least I’d hope for this!!

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You sing, act, host talk shows, do voice-overs and write. What is your dream gig?

I wear many career hats, but my dream is having my own cooking show. I’m self-taught and just love food and watching people eat. Of course, I’m dramatic and a spaz so it’ll be wacky and over-the-top. That’s something in my soul. Another is to play a relative of Melissa McCarthy’s in a movie -or best friends!

You have been public about your successes and struggles when it comes to your health. Why has it been important for you to be so honest?

I have to be honest! It’s part of my recovery in sobriety. It’s part of being a good person. It just feels better to be open about something rather than holding it inside. Someone else, younger or older, is struggling through the same thing. We all need each other. I am not perfect. Some people expect perfection from celebrities. That’s fucking nuts. We have highs and lows. We go up and down… in my case it is weight! (laughing). I need to remain teachable, too. That helps me with humility and being somewhat humble. I’m not humble by nature, so this teaches me to shut up and listen sometimes.

As a mother of two young girls, what is the most important thing you want them to learn from you?

I want my girls to learn from me is honesty and compassion. They have huge hearts and my husband Rob and I could not be more proud of who they are already becoming. Also, I try to teach them that they will make mistakes and so will others. That’s a lesson about forgiveness…. a challenging but critical one.

Besides being an artist, what do you think your mission is in life?

My mission in life is to raise my daughters and also to just be an inspiration to others no matter what I’m going through in my life. I love people and appreciate them. Helping others is extremely fulfilling.

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Carnie with family. Lola (left), Luci (middle) and Rob (right) circa 2015. 

What keeps you “Holding On?”

My strength comes from my children these days. My strength also comes from passion. When you lose passion for anything, you lose zest and inspiration. Passion can be about anything. As I get older, I realize that life is short…. until the next one… so take advantage of time… don’t dwell, live in the now, see the good, have a lot of orgasms, don’t let others control you and GO FOR WHAT YOU WANT.

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Photos via: Instagram: @Carnie68  & Facebook 

https://twitter.com/CarnieWilson  https://www.instagram.com/carnie68/

Christina Applegate Returns To TV In Binge-Worthy Netflix Series, “Dead To Me.”


If you are in need of a binge-worthy fix then be sure to check out Netflix’s “Dead To Me.” Christina Applegate stars as Jen a Real Estate agent and mother of two whose husband is killed jogging in a violent hit-and-run accident. Stuck with grief, she decides against her better judgement to join a support group, “Friends Of Heaven.” It is there where she mets Judy (played by Linda Cardellini), a free spirit who is dealing with her own loss. Jen and Judy could not be more opposite. Jen is extremely cynical and Judy is an optimistic free spirit nut case. The two soon begin to bond over late night phone calls and chocolate chip cookies. But this is no buddy comedy. Judy is not who she appears. She spins a web of lies that are shockingly revealed. Jen on the other hand, is set out on finding the person who murdered her husband while trying to heal from her tragic loss.

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Think you figured it out? Don’t be so sure. There are enough plot twist to keep you wanting more. BuzzFeed named the dark comedy thriller, “Dead To Me” as Netflix’s “The Best New Show Of 2019.” Personally, I’m so excited to watch anything with Christina Applegate. LOVE her to death! Plus, James Marsden stars as Judy’s ex. He’s totally hot!

Christina Applegate attends “Dead To Me” Premiere in Los Angeles.

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Madonna RISES On 2nd Single

If you follow my social post, you know I’ve been giving Madonna a hard time about the lead single off her upcoming release ‘Madame X.’ ‘Medellin’ ft. Maluma failed to chart and left many die hard fans disappointed. It’s not an awful song but a total misfire for a come back single. Frankly, I think Madonna is the best at what she does. She is the Queen. And that’s why I hold her to such a high standard.

Enough about that, let’s shift gears to Madonna’s second single, ‘I Rise.’ A catchy contemporary ballad with pulse. The song starts off with a sample of Parkland School shooting survivor Emma Gonzalez’s speech at the March For Lives rally that went viral in 2018. Emma shouts, “They say, us kids don’t know what we’re talking about, that we’re too young to understand how the government works. We call BS.”

As one of the leading ED medications, you can easily find a reputed pharmacy. http://davidfraymusic.com/david-fray-draws-crowd-in-cleveland-with-mozarts-piano-concerto-no-24/ order viagra prescription ED is not only a psychological problem – Many experts believe that ED is buying generic cialis purely a psychological issue. However, there are many men in India and different parts accompanying it. cialis canada prescription The best way to make sure that you are in the middle of a deserted place? If you are in the age of more than 65, you should follow all the check-list If you decide sildenafil soft , there will be some great offers and deals. cialis no matter how it is you acquired the Injury, PhysiCo. One of Madame X’s alter egos is a freedom fighter. Not only does Madonna advocate for an end to gun violence. She pays tribute to the LGBTQ community. Rise is meant to be an anthem. I wrote ‘I Rise’ as a way of giving a voice to all marginalized people who feel they don’t have the opportunity to speak their mind,” Madonna said in a statement. “This year is the 50th anniversary of Pride and I hope this song encourages all individuals to be who they are, to speak their minds and to love themselves.”

Madonna plans on releasing two more tracks before ‘Madame X’ drops June, 14th. Until then, I’ll have ‘I Rise’ on repeat.

https://youtu.be/eqneqHdELr8

Paula Abdul: Forever Our Girl

   

30yrs ago, Paula Abdul burst into the spotlight. The song and dance girl emerged as a choreographer on the Tracey Ullman Show to a global superstar. Before launching her music career, Paula was choreographing music videos for Janet Jackson and Prince.

In 1988, Paula Abdul released her first album “Forever Your Girl.” The lead single “Knocked Out” began to get traction on MTV. But it wasn’t until “Straight Up,” did the world begin to notice.  Only until recently, after being bumped to number 3 by Adele, Paula’s “Forever Your Girl” reigned as the second longest charting album on the Billboard Hot 100 chart. Abdul enjoyed further success with release of subsequent albums, 1991’s “Spellbound” and  1995’s “Head over Heels.”

Earlier this week Paula Abdul wowed the audience at the Billboard Awards and blew up social media with her epic return to the stage. Following the Billboards, Paula announced a residency at The Flamingo in Las Vegas; kicking off August 13th.
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Paula’s hat toss nearly decapitates Julianne Hough.Audience reacts to Paula’s death defying leap of faith!

Due to chronic pain associated with neck and back injuries from cheerleading,  dancing, car accidents and even a plane crash. Paula put her career on pause until she landed at the judges table on  American Idol. Since Idol, Paula has kept somewhat of a low profile working on her craft, getting into top shape and preparing for the next stage in her career. With 2016’s successful Total Package Tour with New Kids On The Block serving as a warm up. Paula is more than ready to take on Las Vegas. And I’m here for it!

Kathy Griffin An Angel In Pajamas

Last Wednesday, at approximately 3am. I had a bout of insomnia. As I was lying in bed, I jumped on Twitter to see what I’ve missed in the world. I guess Kathy Griffin had been doing the same. I noticed she retweeted something about one of her recent shows at the Laugh Factory. I wanted to see it but didn’t have extra cash. I commented, “I am too broke but it’s on my to do list.” A few moments later Kathy followed me back. And then a DM! I’m not lying. Here’s the proof….

WTF! I nearly fell out of the bed. I could not believe it. Did I just manifest it? I wanted to go. So, why not put it into the universe? Right?

Last night, I headed to the Laugh Factory on Sunset. The show was EPIC. Kathy had been testing new material for the past five Monday nights in her pajamas. IN HER PAJAMAS! Do you see where I’m going with this? I was in bed when I received the invite. And she was wearing pajamas on stage. Brilliant. We must be cosmic soul sisters. No doubt. Kathy you are my new bestie. 

When the lungs are generic cialis pills irritated by harmful particles or gases, they swell and produce a large quantity of semen. I looked at these odd shaped tablets he put into my hand and asked him what they were. “Man, just take the pill, wait about 40 minutes and then grab the wife. viagra wholesale india cerritosmedicalcenter.com There can be several reasons behind that can cause impotency and so you need to be very cautious to make sure cialis get viagra http://www.cerritosmedicalcenter.com/pid-8534 that included ingredients will not cause any medicinal interaction once you take the medicine it will hardly take 20 minutes to be effective for 4 hours) Kamagra soft tablets (take 20 minutes to be effective for 5 hours)Each form contains same chemical ingredient known as. Erectile dysfunction is a problem that has grown in popularity due to the fact that it can effectively and safely eradicate erectile dysfunction, while improving your quality of life as a friend and teacher. tadalafil professional Kathy Griffin was fire. Can’t disclose anything I heard but the bitch is BACK. I laughed the whole time. What a gift. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Let’s do lunch? On you, of course.

Ps. I know you said “no photos.” But rules are meant to be broken. Thanks to Al Colon for the snaps.

 

 

Breaking Through

If you haven’t already seen the movie Breakthrough,  please do. The inspirational true story directed by Roxann Dawson tells the remarkable journey of Missouri teen John Smith who falls into an icy lake.  After being pronounced dead for over 40 minutes. John’s mother Joyce (brilliantly played by Chrissy Metz) prays. Against all odds and logic, John’s heart starts beating again. By all accounts, John should not be alive.  Surviving without any brain injuries and walking out of the hospital a few months later is a true miracle.

The film taps into the prayer, faith and the healing power of words. At one pivotal moment, Joyce hears the doctor’s negatively discuss John’s prognosis. Joyce isn’t having any of it. She tells them not to speak negatively around her son. Believing there is power in words. And that John can hear them.

What does this have to do with Rosanna Arquette? Well, I’ll tell you. Rosanna and I follow each other on Twitter and got into a conversation about the current state of our world and politics. I recommended the film for an uplifting escape. But she had already seen it. We both shared how it inspired us and made us cry. Rosanna said “It made me cry. I feel the power of God and angels everyday in my life and I am grateful.”

She went on to share a similar personal experience with her daughter. Rosanna’s daughter “almost died when she was two years old from E. coli obtained from drinking apple juice. She had total kidney failure. The power of prayer saved her life. So many people prayed and she fully recovered. It was a miracle.” Rosanna prayed too, “I saw eight gigantic angels around her and prayed for my breast milk to come back so I could feed her. And in the morning, I kid you not. It came back. A true miracle. I believe in the power of prayer for all religions. My daughter will soon turn 25.”

I find it hard to understand why so many people discount the things we cannot explain. Especially within the medical community when the human body, experience and world its self is a miracle. As humans we are becoming more and more desensitized and programmed. We often ignore our intuition and take things at surface value. Whatever you are going through; it is for a reason. For you to grow, learn and share. We can help heal others by sharing our struggles. There is always a silver lining.

I’ve lost friends to Cancer and realize prayer cannot save everyone. But we should trust even in those circumstances, we are part of a higher purpose. That said, have faith, spread love and BELIEVE in miracles. Look in the mirror, You are one!

Breakthrough is in theaters  now.

 

 

 

 

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Beverly Bares All In Upcoming One Woman Show

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Supermodel Beverly Johnson, bares it all in upcoming one woman show Beverly Johnson Naked. Friday night, Beverly treated friends, family and industry insiders to a first read at the West Hollywood Library Theater. Attendees included daughter Anansa Sims, Basketball star Matt Barnes, Donna Mills, Harry Hamlin and fellow Supermodel and Bill Cosby accuser Janice Dickinson.  

The show opens with a series of black and white historical images of African American Women who changed the world. Women like Beverly who shattered the glass ceiling.  In 1974, Beverly Johnson made history as the first African American model to grace the cover of Vogue. Beverly takes the audience on a runway walk down memory lane. Recounting her days as a teenage girl growing up in Buffalo, New York to being catapulted on to the world stage at just 17yrs old.

Before Beverly left home to attend college, she was working at a clothing store. The owner suggested she pursue modeling and gave Beverly the number of a well connected friend in New York City. Although Beverly had a more traditional career in mind, she kept the number in her wallet. During school break and in the need of extra cash, Beverly convinced her Mom to take a train to New York City.

In less than a New York minute, Beverly found herself at the offices of magazine publishing giant Condé Nast. When she arrived, the receptionist thought she was there to take a typing test. Beverly said, “No, I’m here to be a model.” Beverly booked a photo shoot the very next day. Within weeks, she was steadily booking jobs for top magazines like Glamour. 

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Celebrated fashion designer, Halston took notice. He invited her to  a dinner party at his home. Liza Minnelli and Elizabeth Taylor were in attendance. Beverly was thrust into this surreal reality but on the flip side was living in a rat infested apartment in Hell’s Kitchen. The illusion of glitz and glamour was overshadowed by the dark underbelly of the modeling industry. And Beverly was no angel. She started using cocaine to stay thin and barely ate. On one hand, while enjoying success, making smart career decisions and advocating for equal wages for African American models she was extremely self destructive.
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Beverly’s choices in men were also a shortcoming. In fact, Beverly is lucky to be alive. Second husband, mobster Danny Sims was a real piece of work. A shady character to say the least. Their marriage was plagued by abuse, drug use, infidelity, corrupt business dealings, a murder investigation and a bitter custody battle. Beverly would ultimately triumph as she found sobriety and reconnected with her daughter.

In 2014,  longtime friend Janice Dickinson appeared on television accusing Bill Cosby of rape. Beverly felt compelled to share her own story of how the “MOTHER FUCKER,” dangled a role on the Cosby Show. He invited her to his home for an audition. Cosby insisted she drink a cappuccino. After one sip, she became dizzy. Beverly knew she had been drugged. When Beverly confronted Cosby, he threw her out of his house and put her in a cab. She woke up the next day in her bed. That’s all she could remember.  Pictured below, Beverly ask the audience by a show of hands if they ever had a  #MeToo moment. More than half the room raised their hand.

Beverly shares her story with a relatable, honest voice. She is strong and beautiful. Looking back through a lens of pain, humor but most of all pride, at 66yrs old, Beverly is a work in progress gearing up for her next series of “first.”

 

CARLTON WILBORN STRIKES A POSE

In 1990, Madonna’s back up dancer Carlton Wilborn seemed to be on top of the world. He appeared in videos like “Vogue”, danced on the Blond Ambition Tour (the most iconic in Madonna’s 30+ year career) and was featured prominently in its behind the scenes documentary, Truth or Dare. This groundbreaking film set the precedent for the reality shows of today.

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Carlton became a fan favorite – meeting Madonna’s daring challenges on and off stage. He played along, but it wasn’t all fun and games. Carlton was secretly living with HIV – and he didn’t want his status to affect what people thought of him. More importantly, while others on the tour were living it up, he worried about his health. Fearing he might get sick, he worried if his body was going to hold up against a grueling schedule that entailed traveling around the world and performing shirtless in the rain.

25yrs later, Carlton along with the surviving dancers are the subject of the documentary Strike a Pose which premieres tomorrow on Logo – 9/8c.  The film is a dramatic tale about overcoming shame and finding the courage to be who you are.

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In 1990, I  was in high school and as a major Madonna fan, I knew all of the dancers’ names. Like Carlton, I had a secret; I was struggling with my sexual identity. Back then, there weren’t many images of gay men portrayed in the media – I identified with the dancers. They provided me an image of what a gay man could look like – Madonna’s dancers were beautiful, masculine and had killer bodies. They made me feel like I was OK.

Carlton went on to join Madonna on her 1993 tour The Girlie Show. He also enjoyed success as an actor and author. But in spite of his success, he was dealing with deep personal issues like the aftermath of being an abused child, sexual identity and sex addition. Carlton made a decision to seek help and to confront his demons head on by tapping into his higher consciousness though various teachings of spirituality and faith.

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Carlton shifted his energy toward helping others by working as a life coach. When I caught up with him to discuss his journey, he said, “Starting my training at Kabbalah was really my first structured personal development work. It came on the heels of “M” – she knew I was going through some things. She was taking classes at the time and through her encouragement; I joined her. I ended up staying with it on my own for a couple of years. I’ve learned the importance of taking ownership of where one’s life is. I’ve finally gotten to a place where I am courageous enough to celebrate Carlton! In our lives, we are given so many tools and if you can’t take that shit and make it work – there’s a problem.”

Through his books and Danceformation teaching system, Carlton hopes to reach the young LGBT community – who he feels “culture does not lend itself to areas of self-improvement or spirituality.” http://www.mydanceformation.com

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I AM MICHAEL

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“I Am Michael”  directed by Justin Kelly and Executive Produced by Gus Van Sant filmed in 2015 made the rounds on the film festival circuit winning rave reviews at Sundance. Two years later, the film earned a distribution deal.  The true story based on Michael Glatze, a former LGBT advocate and San-Francisco based editor of the gay magazine XY, abandons his “homosexual” lifestyle to become a Christian pastor.

We  hear stories about men living heterosexual lifestyles who engage in DL activities or leave their families for the same sex. But rarely to do we see the flip side. James Franco plays Michael with ease. His performance as a gay man in a relationship who enjoys partying and threesomes is comfortably effortless.

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Franco’s partner played by Zachary Quinto  is his support system and biggest cheerleader. However,  Michael is never satisfied. He seems to want more out of life and has a deep desire to help gay youth on a grad level. He wants to change the world.

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Michael is neurotic often having panic attacks. He lives in constant fear  he will die of a heart attack. Due to a health scare, Michael turns to prayer. One is left  to assume he thinks God saved him. Michael becomes obsessed with reading the bible. He seems lost; you can see it in his eyes.
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As Michael rejects his former life, he is deeply conflicted with feelings of lust for other men. That doesn’t stop him from marrying a fellow bible student played by Emma Roberts. She accepts  him and his past. Their chemistry feels awkward, somewhat forced.

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I don’t know if Michael truly becomes “heterosexual” – the point being it doesn’t matter. “I Am Michael” is about removing labels and  self discovery.  A topic Franco embraces with delight.

“I Am Michael” is showing in select theaters and is available on iTunes and OnDemand.

Love Wins On Skid Row

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A sea of tents line the streets of Skid Row. 

It’s been one week since I volunteered at the 3rd Annual Skid Row Carnival of Love.  I spent the day  filled with joy and tears. I was happy to help but seeing people living on the edge was truly heartbreaking.

As a personal guide, I met Tony.  A thoughtful young man who was more concerned about picking up clothing donations  for his girlfriend than for himself. After filling up four bags of clothes, Tony stopped to get his feet washed, signed up for health insurance and saw a doctor for the first time in months (just one of many essential services offered).  Afterwards, as Tony enjoyed a barbecued meal, we sat down and talked about life.  Seeing his bright smile throughout the day warmed my heart.

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I was also  reminded of my own struggles. I am fortunate enough to have an apartment, food, friends and a family that supports me. However without that support, I wouldn’t be able to afford the high cost of living.  Since relocating to Los Angeles, it’s been hard to find work. I have a college education and a solid resume and but am not being called for interviews. Which makes me wonder how are people living in tents supposed to get ahead? I don’t have the answer. But I do know, last Saturday, a beacon of light shined down on a community in much need.

Extra special thanks to Jane The Virgin star, Justin Baldoni and his team at Wayfarer Entertainment (along with their sponsors) for putting on such an incredible event!  As people danced in the street with smiles, Tony looked at me and said “I wish everyday could be like this.” I couldn’t agree more. 🙂

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Justin Baldoni expresses thanks with hand over heart. http://wearewayfarer.com

Arsenal

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If you are looking for a formulatic action thriller, then Arsenal is not it. The new film directed by Steven C. Miller feels more like an indie experiment. And that’s just fine. Shot in just thirteen days, Arsenal is a fast moving, blood soaked thrill ride that asks “How far would you go to save your brother?”

Adrian Grenier and Johnathon Schaech play brothers bound by the childhood discovery of their uncle who commits suicide by shotgun. Mikey (Schaech) protects JT (Grenier) from the gruesome mess by sending him to the arcade.

Later, I’m not sure why or how,  but Mikey stumbles into gangster Eddie King’s (Nicolas Cage)  plastic draped hide out and witnesses  another instance of brutality. One is left to assume this event ties Mikey to Eddie King as an adult. Some details may have been lost, as I viewed the film at a screening held at Laemmle’s Music Hall 3 in Beverly Hills with Schaech and Grenier in attendance.  I was too  busy watching them watch themselves.

As an adult Mikey is no angel. He drinks, has a violent temper and can’t seem to get this life together. JT on the other hand, is a mildly successful business owner who enjoys family backyard barbecues. JT loves and defends his brother despite Mikey’s outburst and shortcomings.

Mikey, in need of cash,  borrows 10K from JT and buys cocaine in hopes of flipping it. This is when the shit hits the fan. The coke is stolen and Mikey is knee deep. Eddie King has his dirty hands in this and kidnaps Mikey in order to extort more money out of JT.

Nicolas Cage, who dons a crazy wig and nose is over the top as Eddie King. The prosthetic nose is kind of distracting, but I told myself it’s because he did so much blow over the years.

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Johnathon Schaech is the stand out. He sets the screen on fire – his presence is strong and powerful.  Blood, sweat and muscle, Schaech breathes life into Mikey with a punch. This is not a man you want to get into an argument with. I could not help but envision Schaech starring in a Die Hard-esque reboot.

Schaech has enjoyed a substantial film and television career. But keep a close eye on him – I predict much more success ahead.

Arsenal is in theaters and on demand now. Check it out! http://lionsgatepremiere.com/arsenalmovie

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Selfie time with Johnathon. 

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Candid shot of Adrian Grenier pictutred with friend outside the theater. 

Evil Nanny

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The camp thriller Evil Nanny directed by Jared Cohn is good fun with plenty of roll your eyes, shake your head and laugh out loud moments.  And I got to appear in a scene! What’s not to love?

When working parents Tim and Fay Tripp (Matthew Pohlkamp and Nicole Sterling) move into Fay’s grandmother’s very old but charming home they decide to hire a nanny to help with their young son and new born baby.  They only need someone part-time, so they offer room and board as a way to entice prospective hires.

“Jen” replies to the ad and meets Tim and Fay for coffee.  “Jen” has a  past – the only thing we know about her is that she burnt a house down, died her hair and assumed the identity of a picture perfect girl next door. The Tripp’s are dazzled and offer her the gig. Before you know it, “Jen” is rearranging furniture and causing waves within the home and couples marriage.

“Jen” convincingly played by Lindsay Elston turns out to be a true nightmare in every sense of the word. After the couple throw a party, “Jen” drinks her face off.  She nearly kills the baby by leaving it in the bathtub while sleeping off a hangover. Clearly, grounds for firing. “Jen” is no dummy and knows her tenants rights. This crazy bitch isn’t going anywhere soon. Sex, drugs, loud music, wild partries and murder. Evil Nanny delivers it all.

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This summer, I got to work on Evil Nanny. It was an early morning call in DTLA, somewhere near the warehouse district. I got lost but eventually found my way.  With my wardrobe options packed in my garment bag, I entered the studio.  The studio looked like something out of a horror movie itself; in desperate need of a renovation.

I was hired to portray a library clerk. I put on my eyeglasses and slipped into character. Before the cameras rolled, I was placed behind the desk with a computer. It was hot as hell and smoke was being used to create effect.

While checking out books, I got to watch Fay trying to dig up dirt on her unwanted house guest. It was a blast. Look for my cameo around 16 minutes in. Hopefully, my next film role will be bigger. Evil Nanny 2?

Evil Nanny is now showing on Lifetime Movie Network.  Check it out! http://www.mylifetime.com/movies/evil-nanny