The Struggle is REAL

admin May 5, 2015June 12, 2015 2,676 Comments

I never thought about it much until, I starting writing, about how difficult it would be to break into the “mainstream” press. I’ve been fortunate enough to share my voice in the gay press, beyond that I’ve had little traction. At first, I questioned my writing ability but as I started to receive feedback from “mainstream” publications assuring me that my ideas and stories were good but were “just not a right fit,” it got me thinking. Am I being discriminated against? This is possibly true, but I don’t think it’s necessarily about me, it’s about years of social inequalities ingrained into the fabric of our society and media.

I’ve written stories about love, relationships, dating, marriage – stories that transcend sexual orientation but the odds of something written from a gay male perspective ending up in the pages of a “men’s” magazine are slim to none. I’m a man too, right?! So where does that leave me? In a box and I don’t like it one bit. Mainly, because I’ve been dealing with discrimination my whole life and I’m tired. I am still fighting the same battle? Yeah, I am.

Not many things, come easy in life. In collage, I was basically ran out of my freshman dorm because I didn’t look like the other guys. I had long hair and I guess that made me a “faggot”. I moved out my dorm but it didn’t stop me from working hard and making the Dean’s List. Early in my career, I was passed over for a promotion “because of my mannerisms” – I didn’t quit, I fought for myself and was promoted shortly after. Just last summer, at my sister’s birthday dinner, I was basically forced out of the restaurant because I was wearing a low cut tank top and refused to put on a t-shirt from the gift shop! That didn’t sit well with me. Especially, since there were plenty of women walking around in strapless dresses; I was even called inappropriate! While my family & sister’s friends thought I was being dramatic, I was really taking pride in myself. I guess the whole shirt thing set off a trigger in me that the others in the group could not relate to. When you deal with discrimination on a daily basis, it’s easy to think the worst. So, when I am told an article I’ve written is “not a right fit” it sends me into a tail spin!

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My goal is to inspire others, to tell the stories of people society may have overlooked. I want to build a future for myself as a writer, I want to break through the barriers. Maybe, I’m a dreamer but that’s OK because I dream of a world where there is less divide and more opportunity for all people. My message, don’t ever give up, keep fighting and never stop being YOU!

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